


I just wanted you to watch me dissolve, slowly.

by CRYPT1D5



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Dad Spy, Father-Son Relationship, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Other, i just really love their bond, is it bc i have bad parental figures? maybe!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:09:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24735184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CRYPT1D5/pseuds/CRYPT1D5
Summary: Sometimes, star-gazing isn't so bad.
Relationships: Scout & Spy (Team Fortress 2)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 48





	I just wanted you to watch me dissolve, slowly.

**Author's Note:**

> The title of this is from the song Dissolve by Absofacto!

It was a warm, clear, night. Scout rubbed his hands together as he walked outside, wanting to use this time of quiet to look at the stars. It was his favorite thing to do when he needed to clear his head-

“Scout?”

Scout gawked as he saw Spy looking back at him, sitting on the grass, surprisingly wearing ..no mask. 

"Spy? What the hell are you doin' here?" Spy rolled his eyes, scoffing,

"Oh,  _ Je suis désolé, _ I didn't know this spot only belonged to you, how terrible of me."

"Wait no, that's not..."

Scout felt his face burn, looking back down at the ground, he gulped. Why was he so nervous?

  


"Well? _ J’attends que tu dises quelque chose _ ." Scout looked back up and saw Spy with his arms crossed, his face impatient.

"I just.." Scout paused, then spoke again, "I just never really see you out here, that's all I was tryin' to say."

  


Spy looked at him, surprised, then sighed,

"I come here sometimes to clear my head."

"Oh, dude same! I like to come out here and look at the stars, also!"

"Really?" Spy replied, amused at his son's excitement.

  


"Yea! Like, I don't do it much now, obviously, but when I was a kid I would...uhh..." Scout lost his train of thought when he saw Spy's face fall. Scout would typically see that reaction when he talked about his childhood, and it made him feel horrible.

Scout knew, even though Spy said it was necessary, the older man still felt guilty about missing Scout's childhood years. And deep down, Scout, for some weird reason, hated seeing Spy look guilty. After a moment of uncomfortable silence, Scout spoke again,

  


"But, uh, yeah, I used to love lookin' at the stars-"

"Why did you stop?"

Scout looked at Spy, startled,

"W-Why did I stop what?"

"Looking at the stars, boy." Spy said, irritated, but then he sighed and looked away,

  


"Ah, sorry, Scout. I just...They seem beautiful tonight. They just have this, I don't know, this  _ look _ about them, wouldn't you agree, son?"

Ignoring the small happiness that appeared in his chest over a simple, dumb, name that Spy had used, Scout nodded. Then, he slowly walked over to the spot where Spy was sitting. Avoiding looking at the other man's face, Scout kept his eyes trained on the sky.

Slowly sitting down next to Spy, Scout felt at ease when the other man didn't comment on it, instead, he also stared at the sky, and rambled under his breath about the mysterious wonders of it.

  


"You know I don't blame you, right? For what you did?" 

  


Scout's confession was met with silence, but he didn't mind. It was the type of silence that only came once in a while, an understanding silence.

Scout had an underlying feeling that he should say another thing, but, when his brain came up with nothing, he just looked down at the grass, running his fingers in the green, wavy blades. 

  


And if he noticed how close both men were to each other, the type of closeness that Spy would never allow, Scout kept his mouth shut, because it wasn't his place to speak of it, at least, not yet.

  


"Scout," Spy started, keeping his eyes trained on the night sky, a certain intense feeling in his voice, "I...I know, it may not look like it, but I care for you. You're my son, and...I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, and I'm sorry I've been, as people say, 'beating around the bush' and not talking about it with you, as if I don't care for how you feel, but...but that's so far from the truth."

Spy turned his body so that he could look at Scout, who was trying, and failing, to hold back tears.

  


"Scout...Jeremy, I know I don't show it much, but I'm so proud of you. I'm proud of who you've become, I'm proud of your stupid fucking jokes, I'm just...I know I wasn't around when you were younger, and I know you forgive me, I mean, I don't even really forgive myself about it at times and...uh...I...I lost my train of thought-"

  


Scout busted out laughing, Spy quickly joining him, chuckling a little.

"I, ah, can't remember my point, but I love you, and I'm sorry, Jeremy."

Nodding, Scout quickly wiped his tears, standing up and brushing himself off,

  


"Jeez, who knew a simple star-gazing night could turn into a sappy one."

  


Scoffing, Spy rolled his eyes, grumbling. Scout looked back towards him, 

"But thank you, dad. I didn't know how much I needed that."

Spy grinned,

  


"You're welcome, son."

**Author's Note:**

> "J’attends que tu dises quelque chose" means "Im waiting for you to say something,"  
> "Je suis désolé" means "I am sorry,"


End file.
